Two Second Rebound Rate (Holly Schindler)
My favorite scene in The Notebook is the one where Ryan Gosling's character is asking Rachel McAdams's character to choose between him and her fiance. He says to her: "You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a two second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing."
I like it so much it makes the whole movie worth watching.
I think, at this point in my life, I might also have one of those two second rebound rates. But it's been fairly hard-won, after decades of taking knocks.
Lucky, yes. Easy? Nope.
When I first started writing, I felt like anything but a writer. I didn't even call myself that--I didn't feel like I had the right, without a publisher behind me. I referred to manuscripts as things rather than books. And, as a result, when my work came back to me (in the SASE envelope days), I cringed, finding it hard to look inside. It was going to hurt. The hurts kept piling until, about four years in, without a single yes from a publisher, I felt like packing it in.
The short of it is that I didn't (obviously). But the fact that I came so close shows how hard it is to rebound. At a certain point, you don't think you have it in you anymore.
This past year, when I decided to revive my artwork and become a commercial artist and surface pattern designer (while maintaining my writing career), I started calling myself an artist right from the beginning. I added it to my social media bios. I posted my pieces on IG. I took ownership of it, right from the beginning.
And I think it made a difference.
Whatever your dream, start referring to yourself by the title you're hoping to achieve but haven't yet. As silly as it seems, call yourself that title now. Because rejection doesn't stop once you get a little success. It will follow you the rest of your days. And it will hurt and it will sometimes knock the wind out of you. But there's something about taking that ownership--it really does make it easier to get back up after those most painful first knocks.
~
Holly Schindler is the author of The Junction of Sunshine and Lucky
Love this Holly. Like when we create characters that ring true. If we take on the "skin" of author or poet or artist we get to feel what that I like. Pretty soon, walking around in those shoes feels right.
ReplyDeleteOh, man, that's so true--walking around in those shoes feels right.
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