Friday, October 31, 2014

WHAT I USED TO THINK WAS SCARY (HOLLY SCHINDLER)

Know what I used to think was utterly terrifying?  Submissions.  When I first started sending my work out in the world, I'd timidly peel open envelopes or click into my email account with my heart ready to pop out of my chest. 

More than thirteen years into life as a full-time author and four published books later, I don't think submissions are scary at all.  Mostly because I've been through the highest highs and lowest lows: seven and a half years of rejection before snagging my first book deal (and a low point four years into it when I nearly chucked it all), then good reviews--even starred reviews--crummy reviews, lovely letters from sincere fans, bulleted-point emails from would-be authors listing my "flaws" as a writer, winning awards, losing awards, signing multiple-book deals, struggling to sell work...

Know what I think's scary now?  NOT having a book on submission.  Not being up to my eyebrows in revisions.  Not exploring new platforms, new genres. 

Around the time she passed away, I saw a clip of Joan Rivers holding up a blank calendar.  "That's failure," she said.  I feel the same way: What makes me a failure as a writer?  Not meh reviews, not low numbers, not rejection.  What makes me a failure is losing my passion, my drive, waking up in the morning and not having three different WIPs on my mind.

Nah, submissions--they're just not scary at all...

Happy Halloween!

2 comments:

  1. The lulls are definitely scary--this wonderful post is so honest--we all have those feelings, and it's great that we can help fuel each other's passions!

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