SAYING YES TO YOURSELF (HOLLY SCHINDLER)
We hear often about how empowering it can be to say no to other people. To stop people-pleasing to the point that you've run yourself ragged and granting favors feels like a burden rather than a pleasure.
It's hard to say no to others. Really hard. Inevitably that feeling creeps in--that awful feeling of letting someone down or hurting their feelings.
But so often, it seems easy to say no to yourself. We all get those new ideas--that desire to do something a little outside of the box. Try a new genre, maybe. Indie publish. Illustrate our work. Try a screenplay. But doubts start creeping in: we worry about how branching out will be received. Or we wonder if all the time spent will result in a project that winds up in a drawer, never to see the light of day.
No, we wind up telling ourselves, I could never do that. (Whatever "that" is.)
But here's the thing--the obvious thing: by never attempting, the project winds up in a drawer anyway. And more importantly, by not empowering yourself with a Yes! I can--I'll figure out a way to make that work!, you wind up digging away at your own self-confidence. Doubt has been invited in to sit on the couch beside you. And for anyone involved in a creative pursuit, doubt is a total dream-killer.
So give yourself permission. Make it your early 2017 resolution to tell yourself yes to that thing (whatever it is) that's been floating around in your head for a while. Do it. Jump in headfirst, without a life jacket. Make yourself figure out how to make it work. One yes leads to another...another. It becomes every bit as confidence building as nos can be confidence destroyers.
Do it: say yes to yourself.
It's hard to say no to others. Really hard. Inevitably that feeling creeps in--that awful feeling of letting someone down or hurting their feelings.
But so often, it seems easy to say no to yourself. We all get those new ideas--that desire to do something a little outside of the box. Try a new genre, maybe. Indie publish. Illustrate our work. Try a screenplay. But doubts start creeping in: we worry about how branching out will be received. Or we wonder if all the time spent will result in a project that winds up in a drawer, never to see the light of day.
No, we wind up telling ourselves, I could never do that. (Whatever "that" is.)
But here's the thing--the obvious thing: by never attempting, the project winds up in a drawer anyway. And more importantly, by not empowering yourself with a Yes! I can--I'll figure out a way to make that work!, you wind up digging away at your own self-confidence. Doubt has been invited in to sit on the couch beside you. And for anyone involved in a creative pursuit, doubt is a total dream-killer.
So give yourself permission. Make it your early 2017 resolution to tell yourself yes to that thing (whatever it is) that's been floating around in your head for a while. Do it. Jump in headfirst, without a life jacket. Make yourself figure out how to make it work. One yes leads to another...another. It becomes every bit as confidence building as nos can be confidence destroyers.
Do it: say yes to yourself.
Yes to saying YES as much as possible! Thank you, Holly.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Holly. This is just what I needed today:)
ReplyDelete